Why You Didn’t Speak Up or Leave, Even When You Knew It Was Wrong
Are you really “stupid” or just stuck in a normal response? Discover the truth about why you freeze — and how to trust your gut again.
STRESS
Khushboo Agarwal- Psychologist
6/13/20251 min read
Have you ever been in a situation that felt off, but you couldn’t act? It can feel like your brain just froze. You knew it was wrong, but you stayed. That’s not because you’re weak. It’s because of a built-in reaction in your brain and body called the freeze response.
In those moments, your thoughts might be harsh: “I am so stupid.” “Did I want this? Did I ask for it?” “I knew something was off. I should have known better.” You’re not alone in this. When you feel fear or pressure, your brain tries to protect you by freezing.
This can happen anywhere: in a job that doesn’t fit, in a relationship that feels wrong, or in moments with scammers who pressure you. Your gut says “No,” but your brain can’t make your body move. It’s how your mind handles overload or panic. You’re not weak; you’re wired this way to stay safe.
People who scam or push your boundaries know this. They use confusion and urgency to shut down your thinking. Even smart, aware people can freeze in those moments. You might look back and ask, “Why didn’t I act? Why didn’t I leave?” But in that instant, you weren’t in control.
Here’s what matters: freezing is human. It doesn’t make you a failure. Next time you feel that gut nudge, pause. Take a breath. Let your gut feeling guide you. Don’t let shame or self-blame hold you back.
You’re not alone in feeling stuck. And you’re not stupid. You’re human. Trust that your gut knows the truth — and next time, let it guide you to take that first step, no matter how small.
